‘When life brings big winds of change that almost blow you over, close your eyes, hang on tight, and believe.’
– Anonymous
I recently experienced something cataclysmic.
The cataclysm: an out-of-the-blue cancer diagnosis.
From having a very healthy body and, in my perception, a very healthy mind, I was suddenly facing stage four gallbladder cancer.
I did not look at my diagnosis as if it were a death sentence.
I did not lie down and say, ‘I’m beaten’.
I decided to warrior up and put on my armour.
The armour that I use to battle cancer is made up of:
1. My equilibrium-seeing mind
I believe my strongest piece of armour is my mind. I am using my mind to really go deep and see the perfect balance that exists in every moment of our lives.
With this piece of armour, I am able to shift my perceptions and see, feel, and understand that there is an equal and opposite ‘good’ to counterbalance every ‘bad’. For every pain that comes with cancer, there is an equal and opposite pleasure.
2. The love and support of family and friends
I am surrounding myself with an abundance of love and support from my tribe of loved ones – my dear family and friends. My tribe lifts and carries me forward in this battle with their love, commitment, encouragement, prayer, and faith.
3. My love for myself
Every day, I work on understanding what it means to really love myself. To love myself irrespective of all the things I don’t like about myself. To acknowledge and accept that I, just like everyone else, have all 4600-plus human traits – ALL of which I need to get through life. And, to face my shadow in all the times I have experienced jealousy, insecurity, anger, and resentment. I may not have outwardly shown these emotions. I may not have even known that I’d been carrying these emotions inside. But they were present.
I am now relearning to love myself for ALL that I am, knowing that I am whole and complete – not broken.
Listening with humility
When the anger, resentment, fear, and bitterness manifest as physical symptoms of disease, I open my ears and listen with humility; I listen with the desire to really understand the symptoms, heed their messages, and shift the emotions that helped create them.
My faith in God
Another piece of my armour is my belief that there is a God who is promising me that all things work for my good and that of those who love me. This is my choice; this will be my story.
Gratefulness
I look for every small – and big – thing to be grateful for. That beautiful walk outside. Hearing the melodic chirping of birds. Seeing the flowers and wonder of new life that comes with spring.
Spending time with myself
By spending some quiet time with myself, I tune in to what my thoughts, feelings, and intuition are whispering (at times, shouting) to me.
As I put on my armour and step into the next day – and the next – of my battle, I pause and take notice of the beauty existing within this battle.
Perhaps it is no more a battle than it is a journey.
A journey with its highs and lows, valleys and peaks.
And, as I watch this journey of mine unfold, I’m reminded that our biggest stressings become our biggest blessings.
Being diagnosed with cancer is a huge blessing.
I am learning so much.
It is my heart’s desire to continue being of service to others by sharing my journey with cancer and all the wonderful life lessons I am learning along the way.
I will be sharing my journey with you via my social media channels as well as these newsletters.
May you look at each day, each second, and each breath as an opportunity to live with meaning, purpose, and love.
From my heart to yours,
Ilze
