“Be patient with yourself. You are growing stronger every day. The weight of the world will become lighter…and you will begin to shine brighter. Don’t give up.”

– Robert Tew

A client I’d previously worked with contacted me and said, “I’ve reached an absolute dead end in my life.”

Now, Samantha has been trying very hard to manifest her deepest desires: a caring life-partner, business success, a great social circle, as well as good health and vitality.

But it’s now nearly the end of 2020 and she feels as if things have been going the opposite way.

On our discovery call, I checked in with her to see what it is she has been using as excuses to not take action and move forward in her life.

I could see that her self-talk consisted of her beating herself up; she really was speaking to herself as if she were her biggest enemy!

We explored what could be pushing her worry buttons and looked into the FEARS getting in her way of taking action.

I offered Samantha some guidance and then told her about 8 Weeks to Shine.

After hearing about what this online course has to offer:

  1. Weekly teaching videos
  2. Weekly question and answer sessions
  3. One-on-one coaching
  4. Group support

Samantha decided that she wanted to get on board.

Although she was a bit nervous about the fee she would have to pay, she came to a realization: if you don’t invest in yourself, in learning the skills, habits, and techniques required to live the life you want to live, nothing will change.

When I asked Samantha, “What is it that you most want right now?” she told me that she is currently busy with something, and should it work out (as she hoped), she would be able to pay for the course.

My response to her was this: “Samantha, I will onboard you, and you will manifest the outcome you desire.”

I am absolutely certain that you too can manifest the outcome(s) you desire. Developing healthy mental habits (like the ones I’ve been sharing with you over the past 2 weeks) will help you do so.

Here is the final mental habit — Mental Habit #5: Practice self-study and self-growth:

  1. Ask yourself what your excuses are

When things don’t turn out quite how you expected them to, who/what do you blame?

When you accept the role you have played in a particular situation or outcome and refrain from placing blame outside yourself, you take back your power and put yourself back in the driver’s seat of YOUR life.


  1. Identify your bad habits

Some common bad habits are:

  • Staying up too late at night and not getting enough sleep
  • Saying “yes” too often (even when you really want to say “no”)
  • Neglecting self-care
  • Allowing negative thoughts to take over your mind
  1. Listen to your language

How do you speak to yourself? What do you say about yourself when you’re speaking to others?

Listen to yourself, paying attention to all the times you say, “I can’t” either in your self-talk or when speaking to others. Practice replacing those “I cant’s” with “I cans”.

Remember, Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or you think you can’t, you’re right.”


  1. Look at yourself

Once you begin to take charge of your thoughts, you will find that you are also taking charge of constructing who you want to be.

Using the list below, select the traits you wish to embody, and rate yourself (using the rating system provided) on how well you currently live those traits.

In doing so, you will be able to identify areas you need to work on.

This process of acknowledging strengths and weaknesses helps when it comes to making critical decisions.

Rating System

1—Not me at all

2—This is me sometimes

3—I’m average at this

4—I do this most of the time

5—This is absolutely me


  1. Committed (no excuses — you don’t let yourself off the hook)1 2 3 4 5
  2. Focused (your priorities are clear, and your choices reflect them) 1 2 3 4 5
  1. Accountable (you take responsibility for your actions and their outcomes) 1 2 3 4 5 4
  2. Positive (you seek solutions and learn from setbacks) 1 2 3 4 5
  3. Present (you focus on one task at a time) 1 2 3 4 5
  4. Growth seeker (you look for ways to improve and take feedback constructively) 1 2 3 4 5
  5. Confident (you believe in yourself) 1 2 3 4 5
  6. Identity/Worth (you talk kindly to yourself, believe in your own value, and are defined by who you are, not by outcomes) 1 2 3 4 5
  7. Select a trait/characteristic of your own (e.g.: persistent, kind, caring, etc) and rate it accordingly 1 2 3 4 5

Revisit this exercise from time to time, to determine whether there has been any improvement.

And if you are looking for a little more guidance on how to practice self-study and self-growth, watch this short, informative video.

Click here to watch the video

(You can go back to my previous emails or visit my Facebook page to access the videos for Mental Habits 1, 2, 3, and 4).


Now, I want to ask you: Are you presently living your best life?

Perhaps, like Samantha, you too are feeling as if:

You’ve reached a dead-end in your life,

Nothing seems to be working out the way you want it to,

You’re stuck in a circle of despair, frustration, and struggle.

I am here to tell you that it doesn’t have to stay this way.

You CAN change the trajectory of your life.

You CAN wake up every morning feeling inspired, meaningful, purposeful.

And if you want to find out HOW you can do so, then drop me an email at ilze@ilzealberts.com

Or Whatsapp me

We can set up a free call to discuss what action steps you can take to get back in the driver’s seat of your life.

From my heart to yours,



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