I came across a phenomenal podcast episode — Oprah Winfrey in conversation with bestselling author, Glennon Doyle.
When Glennon said to Oprah, “I thought of myself as someone who couldn’t handle pain, and so I hid from it,” it struck a chord.
We often create these limiting beliefs around who we are and what we can/can’t do.
We undermine ourselves with recurring negative thoughts without realizing that these very thoughts are shaping our outward realities.
Because our thoughts really do become our things.
That is why it is so important to develop and practice Mental Habit #3: Reduce negative mental attitude and increase a positive mental attitude. (In my previous emails, I shared the first two mental habits that will help you reach your TRUE potential.)
Here’s how you can work on developing Mental Habit #3:
1. Designate a period of time to pay attention to your thoughts
Setting aside some time every day to focus on your thoughts can help you become more aware of the type of thoughts circling your mind.
It can help you identify any limiting beliefs you may have, such as, “Who am I to even think this is possible?” or “I can’t do it — I’m not smart enough.”
2. Observe your thoughts with curiosity instead of judgment
Give yourself permission to just observe your thoughts, whatever they may be, without passing judgment.
Pay attention to when thoughts of fear, anxiety, excuses, blame, and self-criticism (negative thoughts) come up. When they do, remember to call them back.
3. Replace a negative thought with a positive one
After you have called back your negative thought, replace it with a more positive one.
For example, if the negative thought was, “I am just so useless,” you can replace it with, “I will give my very best.”
4. Make CHOICES, not sacrifices
If you perceive a particular decision or course of action to be a SACRIFICE (you are giving up/ missing out on something), you will feel less inspired by it.
However, if you perceive it to be a CHOICE — something you want to do — you will feel more committed to seeing it through.
This slight change in perception will make your “chosen” action steps feel more aligned with the desired outcome: the achievement of your goal.
5. Work through negative emotions
This can be done by:
- Trying to understand WHY you are feeling a particular negative emotion (getting to the root of it)
Usually, there are other emotions brewing beneath that initial negative emotion.
If, for example, the negative emotion you are feeling is “fear of failure” you might find that beneath it lies disappointment that you could not bring about the change you desired.
- Balancing the emotions with FACTS
Remind yourself of all the times you succeeded at something/ achieved your desired outcome.
- Applying reason
Look at your situation and separate all the things you CAN control from all the things you CAN’T.
There will always be things that are out of your control; it would be more helpful to shift your focus to the things that are within your control.
- Taking action
Taking action is one of the best things you can do to manage difficult emotions. So, what do you think? Are you ready to start practicing Mental Habit #3: Reduce negative mental attitude and increase a positive mental attitude?
Don’t worry if you don’t quite have the steps nailed down — in this short, straightforward tutorial, I’m breaking drown Mental Habit #3 for you.
Once you begin to master this mental habit, you will see just how powerful your thoughts are.
In the podcast episode I told you about, Glennon Doyle mentions how “getting still” each day to process her thoughts helped her move past the underlying fear and decide what to do about her husband’s infidelity.
She also recounts her earlier days, when, deep in the throes of addiction, she once found herself on the bathroom floor…with a positive pregnancy test.
And in how, in that life-changing moment, she decided to make a choice: to go to rehabilitation and work through her addiction for herself and her baby.
I found Glennon’s story to be most inspiring.
Her ability to take control, make choices that best serve her (no matter how tough they may be), and emerge stronger at the end of each “crisis” is inspiring.
Because I absolutely love to see people surpass their own limitations and become the truest version of themselves.
To own up to their birthright.
To realize that everything they need for a beautiful, purposeful life is within them.
Let’s set up a call (no charge at all) to explore how I can help you to live your best life being unapologetically you.
From my heart to yours,